Livin' the Dream.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Livin' the Dream.
Just Livin'. . .the Dream.
Our little life, full of all that is sweet.
Baby chicks being hatched and grown at preschool.
Kittens and snails and puppy dog tails.
Early mornings, slow to rise, 
as if preparing our bodies for summer. 
Where little toes stay tucked well past 8 and have to be tugged gently awake for school.
These lovely rain-soaked evenings and breezy months
before suffocating humidity and throbbing air conditioners.
Sometimes we wake a little TOO early.
But we deal.
Succumb to morning cartoons or quiet snuggles,
until the house and the rest of us, have awoken.
Warm, May-in-Minnesota evenings packed with softball and baseball.
Gracie is playing this year, which has me ecstatic.
To finally put that untouched athletic ability to use, of course.
But more importantly, to see my girl out of her shell, 
being social AND active all at once.
My heart swells with pride.
Our weekday evenings, which are all spoken for,
we are shuffling more than not.
From one ball field to the next,
no time for sit-down dinners.
Instead, unraveling Jimmy John's subs from their paper, maybe Chipotle, Subway and back around again the next week.
Thinking, hoping, as summer approaches, 
life will slow down.
But it just seems to be ramping up.
So we abuse any down time we have, with utter laziness. 
Or whatever moves us.
Finding comfort in cozy tees and hoodies.
The simple things that make us happy. 
Our schedule is packed, but life is good.
No matter how tired, well worn and pulled tight,
we can always find a lil' spring.
Let's continue to be honest.
It's not all rainbows and unicorns.
I've reached a new low.
Speaking of Jimmy John's, 
or Jimmy's Johnnys,
I don't know what's more humbling.
Having so little control over your bowels in your 30's?
Or having to use the public porta potty on a busy road through town,
on your way to Yoga after dropping the kids at school,
because you can't make it home.
I parked as close as I could and ran for cover,
praying no one would see me using a porta potty at an empty park,
three blocks from my house.
Yeah, that bad.
Despite slow mornings and sun-shiney afternoons,
I often find my children to be terribly annoying.
With all the whining and complaining and bickering and begging. . .
the noise, noise, noise.
The learned sarcasm and sass, 
which some days I think is a good thing,
that at such young ages,
they have the ability to find humor in everything.
That they're learning the art of laughter to cope with life and each other.
But often use it inappropriately.
My fault.
How the few hours I'm actually WITH them during the school day,
their questions have no answers and seem to be strung together in one long paragraph.  
They follow me around from room to room, always underfoot and inquisitive.  
Which is beautiful AND. . .annoying.
I laughed a hearty laugh out loud
at a charm I saw in a store the other day.
Do mothers wear these charms close to their heart on cheap silver chains?
Over the pulsing veins of their wrists?
Do we need to be reminded?  By jewelery?
Some days, I think we do.
It's easy to LOVE our children, hard to LIKE them some days. 
We're often in need of reminders, to be patient with them.
To stop what we're doing and sink down to their level,
make eye contact, REALLY see and hear them.
But if we're awake,
we are forced in the moments of stillness,
in the doctors' waiting rooms,
the t-ball bleachers 
spring concerts, 
bedtimes and teeth brushing, 
reminded in all these ordinary moments that make up a life in parenting,
of the extraordinaire in this ordinary life.
A beautiful boy from Stillwater, MN, died yesterday.
Zach Sobiech was just a kid.
A short life pulled to a close, too early.
It's amazing how someone you've never met,
can touch your life so deeply.
Who's own life, journey and love will inspire you forever. 
I thought about him all day yesterday and still today.
And hope I will continue to remember him,
when I am lacking in patience, kindness and compassion for my own children.
Learn and pull from his incredible life and spirit,
while I continue to do my best to be present in my own.


Kristin said...

I just watched the video about Zach this morning, what an amazing kid with a beautiful spirit. He definitely put into perspective what is important in this life. While watching the video I just kept seeing his mom's brave face and thinking how her heart must be breaking inside. I cannot imagine. I will definitely give me sassy, selective hearing children an extra sqeeze tonight.

B. Holmes said...

I also linked Zach Sobriech's videos to my blog yesterday, what a sweet uplifting kid... His music is also amazing! Love the T-shirt your sporting, but where's your man's beard, or is he just cool with you checking out all the bearded hotties in MN? I like them too, and my man has one about 90% of the time, but I don't have the shirt. There is a beard and mustache contest up here in Alaska, I know a couple guys who have entered. Funny. Yes it's also funny how your darling little LOVED ones can also grate on your nerves, give you a headache and be making a huge mess for you to clean up. Usually all at the same time, mine are being quite loud as I type this, time to go "mother" these little trouble makers that I love beyond words. Your blog ROCKS by the way...

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