there HAS to be grocery store etiquette, right?

Saturday, October 3, 2009

while away on a trip a few weeks ago, brian (adorable hubbie,) braved the gates of hell (Cub Foods,) with all 3 kids, of course, because i didn't have time to get there before i left (brian=10 pts./wife & mother=0.) anyway, he shared this lovely experience with me upon my return & with it, a little story about almost being taken out by a little old lady & her grocery cart.

he saw her coming down the aisle (on the wrong side.) i'm sorry, but isn't driving the grocery cart just like driving a car? riding a bike? walking on the sidewalk? STAY TO THE RIGHT! simple. well, she wasn't. just like some 'older' individuals should NOT be driving, this, i'm sure, normally sweet, old woman, should not be pushing a grocery cart.

anyway, brian saw her coming. and HE was on his correct side. he told me he said to himself, "i'll be DAMNED if i'm moving (this massive, kid-friendly-impossible-to-maneuver-boat-of-a-cart for this woman.) she can move." so, he's quite literally playing 'grocery-cart chicken' with her.

he gets closer, she gets closer. he speeds up. she speeds up. he doesn't budge. she MOVES at the last minute! BUT! only at the VERY last minute, realizing she's dealing with a tough guy with 3 cookie-faced kids hanging out of the cart. but she doesn't move smoothly.

as she finally pushed ahead to go around him, SHE CLIPS HIS LITTLE TOE & NEARLY TEARS HIS TOENAIL OFF! o.k. we all know how it feels to stub a toe or lose a nail. imagine getting the nail of your baby toe clipped by a grocery cart! i CRINGED when brian told me this! "WHAT DID YOU DO?! DID YOU SCREAM? CURSE?" i would have! i am a 'sorenson girl,' after all. for some reason (i blame genetics,) there's an intense amount of rage just at the surface of our bellies & it doesn't take much to light that fuse, right sisters?)

i know i would've cursed up a storm. brian's a better person than me. he said he LITERALLY bit his tongue, wanting to SHOUT every curse in the book, but he was, afterall, in Cub, the kids right there. . .he didn't do it. he stood there REALING in pain, his little toe throbbing, bleeding now & the nail hanging on by a thread.

"BRIAN! DID YOU SAY ANYTHING? DID YOU LOSE YOUR MIND AT HER? MY GOSH! I WOULD'VE PUSHED THE KIDS ASIDE & FISH-HOOKED HER DOWN TO THE GROUND!" (o.k. no, i wouldn't have, but certainly would've thought about it.) he was just too stunned. and she didn't say ANYTHING. really? are you kidding me?! SOME PEOPLE! i don't care how OLD you are!

when he finally calmed down, he looked back to, i don't know, say something? she was already turning the corner, having no idea the physical pain & anguish she'd just caused. needless to say, my blood was boiling just LISTENING to this story & imagining myself in this situation, or having been with him when this happened! God help her if she ever crosses MY path at Cub! she's goin' down!


Jenny said...

Love this post Liz! Found the link to your blog when you posted on Lucy's site. I've been blogging for a couple of years now and love it. It's a good outlet when you're at home all. day. long. -- check it out!

BEES'NETTA said...

Yes! When I have an intense rage the boils up when I stub a toe, pin my finger while sewing, etc. I swear and throw things. :)

Kayla said...

I don't know how he was able to go grocery shopping with the kids. I could never keep those three in one cart!

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